VOL. 25, ISSUE 2 Thursday, February 21, 2008 SINCE 1973

Britanny Rhoads On: Sex Positions for the Self-Conscious

A female named Brittany Rhoads, smiling.

“Skeletons aren’t sexy,” says Matthew Spaulding, 20. “I don’t like to be able to count exactly how many ribs a woman has, or anything like that. I mean, every guy is going to check out what they call the stereotypically ‘beautiful girl’ who’s skinny and everything, but when it comes right down to it, most guys I know wouldn’t want to date them because they feel that they’re too skinny and that it’s not realistic and most people are going to look at fuller sized girls and say, ‘you know, that’s a beautiful woman right there’.”

If that isn’t reason enough to stop stressing over being a healthy size 10, I’m not sure what is. Women are self-conscious about their bodies. I don’t believe that any one thing is to blame either. However, with the “Cosmopolitan” magazine covers, the weight loss supplements promising that you’ll lose 10 pounds in week, and our guy friends and boyfriends obsessing over porn and the latest “Sports Illustrated” swimsuit issue, it’s tough to feel sexy and beautiful if you don’t look like you should be modeling for Victoria’s Secret. Even women who are small feel self-conscious. Just as some heavier set women feel self-conscious about their tummies, hips, and thighs, some thin women obsess over their small breasts and their boyish figures.

If walking around in your own skin isn’t bad enough, intimacy can become a major issue. If you don’t love your own body, it’s difficult to expect others to accept your curves. Most coupled self-conscious women have a partner who loves them for more than just their bodies. “If a guy is already having sex with his girlfriend and he’s in love with her and not a jerk, or anything, he obviously doesn’t care what she looks like,” explained Spaulding. “He’s more interested in being with her than [caring] if she doesn’t have a perfect figure, or if she thinks her ass is too big, or something silly like that.”

I believe that, regardless of all the men out there who love women’s bodies just the way they are, many women are still going to feel uncomfortable about sex, even if they are in love with their partners. Body acceptance takes time, but it shouldn’t mean that you can’t be comfortable and intimate with your partner. Here are three ways to make you feel great about your body in bed!

If you don’t love your tummy but love your booty, try “doggie style”. Bent knees will tighten your thighs, highlight your bum and keep your tummy covered. This also provides for deep penetration and some serious G-spot stimulation. What woman wouldn’t like that? Try this one even if your tummy is your favorite body part!

 

If you don’t love your backside but love your breasts, try “cowgirl,” also commonly known as “girl on top”. This position works in a few ways. Number one: This is great if you’ve got great breasts, regardless of size. Large chested or small chested, this position will show them off. Number two: Reverse cowgirl is excellent, especially if you have a mirror. Prop your partner’s shoulders up with a pillow so he can comfortably see the mirror – same purpose of showing off what you love about your body, but a different angle of penetration.

If you just don’t like any part of your body at the moment, try a sexy camisole and some candles. If you’re in the dorms, they make flameless candles as well. Candlelight is said to be the most flattering light. The silky camisole is there to cover what you don’t love, and if it makes you more comfortable, you’re going to have a better time. Don’t make a huge production out of it. If you wear a tee-shirt to bed and refuse to take it off, your partner might sense that you’re feeling uncomfortable, which is a complete mood-killer. However, if you explain that wearing a silk nightie makes you feel ridiculously sexy, it might just add to the mood. If you’re feeling really daring, take it off after you start to feel more comfortable with your body and wear only candlelight. That’s an “outfit” he’ll remember for a while.